‘Teen Wolf’ was in a very revealing mood this go ’round.  We discover the human identity of the rogue Druid/Darach on the loose, AND we discover the supernatural identity of Lydia’s tranced-out alter ego.

Let’s get ready to RECAP!

After yet another Darach sacrifice at episode’s outset , Lydia is trancing out and soon leads Scott and Stiles to the latest body….and this time, the victim is a lady cop.

Meanwhile….Allison has started thinking her dad might be the one behind the Darach rampage.  After all, it’s not every dad who has a fully stocked arsenal in the garage, experience in lethal hand-to-hand ( and crossbow-to-face) supernatural combat….oh, and a map in his home office upon which he’s marked future Darach sacrifices that have yet to happen.  Isaac shows up – deployed by Scott, he says.  Isaac volunteers to help Allison get to the bottom of things.  There may or may not be an “ahem” and skeptical raised eyebrow lurking in that statement, given how many longing looks he casts in the fair maiden’s direction.

Meanwhile, the Testosterone Twins are amping out at school.  Aiden is vehemently opposed to Ethan’s romance with Danny.  It’s a sort of (and I quote), “I’ll claw his face off and eat it” level of disapproval.  He reminds Ethan that they’re only pretending to be hot high schoolers so they can eliminate the threat of the other pack, and Scott in particular.  Business, not pleasure.  They’re NOT here to suck face.

wonder twins

Cut to Aiden and Lydia sucking face.  (Sucking face is surely a good way to maintain that high school stud “cover story,” anyway.)  See, Scott and Stiles want to talk to Ethan – since he’s clearly the more sensitive one.  They need a distraction to get Aiden away from Ethan. Scott and Stiles look speculatively at our favorite redhead.  After five seconds’ hesitation, Lydia offers to take one (twin) for the team!  And boy, does she.

lydia va va voom

The ploy works.  While Lydia is distracting Aiden, Scott and Stiles get some meaningful intel from Ethan.  It wasn’t the twins’ idea to kill Boyd, he says, but…they owe Deucalian so much.  See, before he made them alphas, they used to be omegas in another pack. To those of you not fluent in werewolf lore lingo, omegas are bottom-feeding bitches to the rest of the pack.  (Were this the Broadway musical episode of Teen Wolf, Ethan would be singing It’s A Hard-Knock Life from Annie right about now.)  So, under Deucalian’s tutelage, Aiden and Ethan killed every hot mess of a jerk in their old pack…and we come to learn that Deucalian also had his followers killing their Druid emissaries, too.  Ethan says this is how they figured the Darach on the loose is likely a Druid who didn’t take kindly to being slaughtered (or nearly slaughtered and left for dead).  Hmmmmm.

Aiden and Lydia’s smooching is disrupted by someone clawing a revenge doodle on the door of their make-out hiding place.  Derek?

No, it’s CORA, ready to bitch-slap these guys to their knees.  She doesn’t understand how everyone else can do the fake nice thing with these jerks after they killed Boyd.  Smackdown in the gym locker room to follow….only it’s Aiden who is teaching Cora how to heel.  With the aid of a barbell weight.  To her face.

cora smackdown

Scott and Stiles rush in to save the day Cora whilst Ethan puts a figurative leash on his brother.  Ethan reminds Aiden that the you-have-24-hours-to-join-us-or-DIE deadline that Cali issued to Derek is still in effect (apparently the werewolf equivalent of the pirate parlez/parley thing).  After the Testosterone Twins take their leave, Cora berates the very friends who saved her, because they are so fake for not trying to avenge Boyd’s death, and also so lame because all they are good at is discovering dead bodies, and not saving live ones.  (Ouch.  But also….um, Cora, yours would have been next if they’d come 10 seconds later, but never mind…we know how ungrateful and petulant and self-righteous teenagers can be.)

Back to Allison, Isaac, and Allison’s hottie dad’s mysterious psychic Druid crime scene map.  What’s more mysterious than a mysterious psychic Druid crime scene map?  A mysterious Celtic symbol with more blacklight-visible notations hidden beneath the mysterious psychic Druid crime scene map.   Which Allison and Issac discover!  This may come in handy.

Cut to school grounds, where, out of nowhere, Derek materializes. Ms. Blake and Derek make out in a wind tunnel against a backdrop of sexy music. Which reminds me that once again, Teen Wolf, you are really being stingy with the Derek dispersal in this episode.  We are not happy about this.  Anyway, clearly Derek is done licking his wounds and is ready to aim that tongue elsewhere.

morrell

Scott decides to seek out Ms. Morrell for guidance counseling of a different kind.  Sure, she’s the secret Druid emissary to a pack of bloodthirsty alphas, and she’s got a withering death glare that she directs at Scott all the time, but she draws the line at being a Darach.  Puh-leeze.  Surprisingly, she offers up perhaps the only useful guidance that has ever been deployed in a guidance counselor’s office in the history of guidance counseling.  She tells Scott to wake the eff up – that Deucalian is obsessed with him, and with his prospect of being a true alpha.  Deucalian wants Scott in his pack voluntarily – because a true alpha in the pack really ups the pack’s street cred.  But hey, if Scott won’t go willingly, that Deucalian will use those villainous English-accented taunts to goad Scott into becoming a ruthless killing machine and squander Scott’s true pure alpha-ness.  Basically, if Deucalian can’t have Scott’s true pure alpha-ness, then no one can.  Makes sense?  No?
Moving on….

lydia

A teacher is kidnapped – the latest victim in the sacrificial Darach crime spree.  Lydia is drawn to his classroom immediately following his abduction, and to the mysterious Celtic symbol upon his chalkboard.  In a trance, she writes the number “2” within one of the symbol circles.  And then starts screaming like a……..oh, wait, don’t want to give too much away.  Yet.

In the time it would take for, oh, say, Derek to mysteriously appear in a wind tunnel against a backdrop of sexy music, Lydia finds herself explaining this weirdness to the cops and teachers.  Or not explaining.  She doesn’t know what this weird psychic trance-like gift of hers is.  So everyone can just stop treating her like some kind of tranced-out psychic freak already.  Now if you’ll excuse her, she needs to gather her strength for the next tranced-out psychic freak episode……

Cut to Stiles, who has decided to finally, maybe, perhaps try to tell his dad that the reason his dad has all these unexplained murders on his hands is because their town is crawling with werewolves.  Besides, it looks like this third murder trilogy might have something to do with cops – or “guardians,” per the mysterious blacklight-visible scrawl on Allison’s dad’s mysterious Celtic symbol hidden beneath the mysterious psychic Druid crime scene map!  Make sense?  No?  Moving on….anyway, because Stiles’ dad is also a cop, Stiles thinks his dad might be the next target, and thus, he really, really needs to know this stuff.  Some of this stuff, at least.  Like, that Scott’s a werewolf.  So is Derek.  So are some of the other kids.  Not everyone is a werewolf, though.  Some are werewolf hunters!  And Druids!  And Druids gone bad!  And snake-like Jackson things!  Yes, sure…some of it may be a stretch.  Whatever he can pass off as plausible in his dad’s eyes will suffice.

stiles chess

Which turns out to be none of it.  Even though Stiles brought Cora along for show and tell purposes, that barbell weight to the forehead takes its toll at the least opportune moment ever, during the moment of Stiles’ big reveal to his dad.  Instead of transforming on command, Cora passes out thanks to that concussion. (I guess her supernaturally advanced werewolf healing powers are acting up today.)

In other news, Allison and Isaac use her dad’s map (yeah, that one) to find the location of the latest missing teacher.  They show up just in time to see Allison’s dad almost kill the Darach at the scene of the crime with a bad-ass display of double-handed gunplay!  (Could he get any more DILF-y?!)  And he would have succeeded in killing the Darach, too, if it weren’t for those meddling kids!  The Darach gets away.

allisons hottie dad

Back at the hospital where Cora has been admitted, Stiles’ dad is so mad at Stiles for wasting his time when there is obviously a human murderer on the loose here, which Mr. Stilinsky should be busy catching right about now.  Stiles hates to play the motherless boy trump card here, but….well, his mom would have believed him when he said that werewolves were real.  Sniff, sniff.

Back at school, there’s a memorial concert for the shit-ton of classmates, teachers and others townsfolk who have died mysteriously, in Costco-level volume, over the past few weeks.  This concert is Ms. Blake’s pet project, as a way of bringing the community together to mourn and to heal, because she’s the too good to be true type.  The too good to be true type, I said.

Lydia and Scott meet up at the concert.  Lydia wants to try harder to use her mysterious trance powers for good, and not for just finding bodies after the fact.  Like Cora said.  Scott said he’s got her back – with his pointy teeth and sharp claws and superhuman strength.  He doesn’t say any of that last part out loud, but of course it’s implied.

PTA meeting

Stiles’ dad feels a wee bit guilty for not believing his motherless son.  He decides to start poking into all of the mysterious deaths in greater detail.  Scott’s mom aids him by breaking hospital rules and providing him with hospital records.  Yes, we could have all saved ourselves a lot of time if Stiles’ dad had just thought to ask Scott’s mom, “Is your son a werewolf?”  But then we’d miss out on that “Doh!” look on his face later when he sees it with his own two eyes…..

Stiles’ dad takes interest in a file which talks about a woman who was mauled in the woods.  Scott’s mom says that what was really weird about it was the fact that on the day when the body was brought into the hospital, birds started flying into windows and killing themselves en masse.  Hmmmmm, didn’t that also happen to the classroom of a particular English teacher not too long ago???

miss blake

Lydia gets a text from Aidan.  Aidan wants to meet up.  Lydia is kind of annoyed, on account of her trying to find the Darach’s next victim right now, but…..Aidan is hot.  She goes to meet him.

Cut to Aidan in the audience of the concert, who realizes he has lost his phone.

Lydia wanders the darkened hallways of the school alone en route to her rendez-vous, because if characters learned their lessons in this kind of show, it would be no fun.  And who is waiting for Lydia in the classroom?

ms blake

 Oh, hi, Ms. Blake.  She must be there to remind Lydia that as a community, they can mourn and heal, together.  No, wait…she’s there to coldcock Lydia on the back of the head.  Nice one.  Meet the Darach’s human alter ego – who, also being a too good to be true hottie English teacher in her spare time, takes this opportunity to explain to Lydia the etymology behind the word “sacrifice.”

lydia2

Lydia shrieks….and all the werewolves can hear her!  From miles away, as Derek – sitting at the hospital bedside of Cora – discovers.  Because Lydia is a……wait for it….

Banshee.  And not the post-punk-band-member-from-the-80s kind.  Or, as Ms. Blake calls Lydia, the “Wailing Woman.”

Whuuuuu….?

Too bad Ms. Blake is gonna have to kill Lydia anyway.  Because, in addition to the garrote she has around Lydia’s neck, she’s got another nickname for Lydia, too.  “The girl who knew too much.”  Oh dear. That doesn’t bode well for a girl with a garrote around her neck and a mad Darach standing behind her.

stiles dad

BUT….Stiles’ dad arrives, guns ablazin’ (or ready to…ablaze…).  He aims his gun at Ms. Blake!  Only she’s a supernatural Darach, sucka!   Who also, conveniently, has mad ninja skills.  No throwing stars handy?  This knife will do.  Scott also bursts onto the scene – in werewolf form.  Stiles’ dad might be feeling a little stupid right about now for not believing his son about werewolves and rogue Druids.  Oh, no, wait…that’s the knife in his shoulder that he’s feeling.  But that Darach all up in his face and business is also very compelling.  So is Scott in werewolf form.

darach

Then the Darach practically disappears in a vapor – carting poor Stiles’ dad with her – as Stiles burst into the room.

Detention just got a whole lot scarier.

stiles and scott say whuuuut